Fear me.

Diets.
Diets are great if you're fat or have an intolerance to something.
Diets are not great when I'm on one. I am not in the slightest bit fat, bloated sometimes where I resemble a pregnant chick, but that goes down and it's okay.
If you know me well, you will know the extent of my chronic headaches and agonizing migraines is absolutely tragic. They interfere majorly with my life. This is what the diet is for, cut out basically anything that is a known migraine/headache trigger for 2 weeks then each week introduce one sort of food back into your diet to see if it triggers these pains or not.
Processed foods, preservatives and gluten are the 3 things I have to cut out. What does that leave me with? Rabbit food.
I'm on day 5 now. I fully crashed. My body does not respond well to no candy, my body loves candy. My moods dropped too. People were genuinely beginning to fear me.
I told someone I'd never met before "Shut the fuck up or I'll rearrange your face". I came dangerously close to punching her in the face. I would have had no empathy.
I announced that anyone who respects their life and their faces will not piss me off next week as my uterus is due to shed it's lining next week and everyone knows I'm a bitch on my period, I'm a bitch with chocolate, I'll be a homicidal maniac with out it. Later I warned my boyfriend, at this point he'd experienced one of my rages as we had gone to the mall to get dinner and nothing was there that I could actually eat. I don't know if he could tell, but I was on the verge of tears.
I told him that if he ever wanted his nuts to reproduce ever again, he would not do anything even slightly out of line next week. Christ, even I'm afraid of what sort of monster I'm going to morph into.
Later the hunger got unbearable so he took me to the supermarket where I found some microwave rice, gluten free, preservative free and no processed. I was happier. I realised sorbet is allowed in my diet too. I got some of that.

Back at his I plowed through the rice like an African child would then moved on to the sorbet. I don't think I've ever been happier in my life. Elliott said it was good to see me that happy, as for the previous 3 hours, I'd either been sleeping, complaining, bitching or trying to prevent myself from killing something.

I think you should all be extremely grateful that sorbet exists, otherwise the world might have met a grizzly end by the end of next week.
Sorbet will be the only thing preventing some murderous massacre occuring.

Oh, and if a series of horrific crimes occur next week, it was totally not me.