You make me laugh, you make me smile.
Baby, you should stay a while.
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
No offence.
I saw a book advertised online which reminded me of this one delightful Christmas.
I was 14 at the time. We were all exchanging gifts. My mildly creepy uncle handed my mum his gift to her. She opened it to reveal a book titled "Before your teenager drives you crazy, read this!" Mum laughed and looked at me. My uncle quickly said "No offence, Michelle, but I've heard some things."
The book didn't work.
I was 14 at the time. We were all exchanging gifts. My mildly creepy uncle handed my mum his gift to her. She opened it to reveal a book titled "Before your teenager drives you crazy, read this!" Mum laughed and looked at me. My uncle quickly said "No offence, Michelle, but I've heard some things."
The book didn't work.
Saturday, March 3, 2012
"No, she's definitely not black."
So, I worked tonight. A fairly normal, unexciting event.
I had a customer come through, he was talking on the phone.
"Hello, how are you today?" I asked automatically, disregarding the fact he was on the phone.
"Pretty good, yourself?" He replied
"Yeah, good thanks."
The person on the other end must have asked who he was talking to because he said to them "Oh, see how polite I am, interupting our conversation to be nice and converse with the lovely young check out chick"
I can only guess what the other end of the phone was saying, but he said the following:
"Yeah, she seems lovely."
"She is quite a pretty young thing."
"Yes, she's very pretty."
"Got a lovely set of eyes on her."
He held the phone out and told me to say hello, so I followed his instruction and said hello delightfully.
He put the phone back up to his ear.
"See, she's pretty and friendly too!"
"No, she's definitely not black."
"I'm pretty certain she's not black."
"Nah, she looks pretty white to me."
I'd finished scanning his groceries and gave him the final total.
He paid by eftpos. I put the transaction through and he went to go swipe his card but stopped and said down the phone "Hang on, I gotta pay for this. Here, talk to this lovely young lady." He thrust the phone at me and said "Talk to her while I do this."
"Hello" I said.
"Hello, how are you?" The lady on the other end asked.
"I'm delightful, mildly confused but delightful."
"Ahh, yes, he's a bit eccentric isn't he?" She said.
The man interrupted "Tell her you're not black!" He yelled.
"Yeah, so, I'm pretty white. I'm like, really white." I assured her.
"I'll believe you this time" She said.
His card accepted.
"Oh well, wonderful having this odd conversation with you, I shall hand you back now, adios." I said and handed the phone back.
"TOLD YOU SHE'S NOT BLACK." He said really excitedly to her, farewelled me and then upon receiving his receipt, walked merrily off, leaving me confused as to what exactly just happened, and everyone around me with very confused faces.
It was beautiful.
I had a customer come through, he was talking on the phone.
"Hello, how are you today?" I asked automatically, disregarding the fact he was on the phone.
"Pretty good, yourself?" He replied
"Yeah, good thanks."
The person on the other end must have asked who he was talking to because he said to them "Oh, see how polite I am, interupting our conversation to be nice and converse with the lovely young check out chick"
I can only guess what the other end of the phone was saying, but he said the following:
"Yeah, she seems lovely."
"She is quite a pretty young thing."
"Yes, she's very pretty."
"Got a lovely set of eyes on her."
He held the phone out and told me to say hello, so I followed his instruction and said hello delightfully.
He put the phone back up to his ear.
"See, she's pretty and friendly too!"
"No, she's definitely not black."
"I'm pretty certain she's not black."
"Nah, she looks pretty white to me."
I'd finished scanning his groceries and gave him the final total.
He paid by eftpos. I put the transaction through and he went to go swipe his card but stopped and said down the phone "Hang on, I gotta pay for this. Here, talk to this lovely young lady." He thrust the phone at me and said "Talk to her while I do this."
"Hello" I said.
"Hello, how are you?" The lady on the other end asked.
"I'm delightful, mildly confused but delightful."
"Ahh, yes, he's a bit eccentric isn't he?" She said.
The man interrupted "Tell her you're not black!" He yelled.
"Yeah, so, I'm pretty white. I'm like, really white." I assured her.
"I'll believe you this time" She said.
His card accepted.
"Oh well, wonderful having this odd conversation with you, I shall hand you back now, adios." I said and handed the phone back.
"TOLD YOU SHE'S NOT BLACK." He said really excitedly to her, farewelled me and then upon receiving his receipt, walked merrily off, leaving me confused as to what exactly just happened, and everyone around me with very confused faces.
It was beautiful.
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